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Good day my fine friends today’ s picture relates my endeavours to harness the supernatural auspicious powers of allegedly lucky knick-knackery. I had seen a particularly fine vehicular stunt on the T'interweb and thought I might incorporate it into my wooing technique and assumed that combined with my newly found knowledge of trinkets of super trickery type that Old LemMe was about to embark on a wooing fest of umparalled success. Well I should have been forwarned when on stooping to scoop up the `lucky penny`in my, I perhaps a tad too eagerly assumed fortuitous, path I was clipped by a rogue tri-cyclist of around three years old with an absolute lack of vehicular control. In order to cleanse my scuffs resulting from the aforementioned misfortune I prepared to bathe them with an antiseptic type of salty wash but on spilling a significant proportion of medicinal granules yours truly, in pandering to either superstition, old-wifery or other potential tosh did project said spillage with over-the-head-intent but my attention was arrested by my neighbours allegedly lucky moggy-noir and said projected missile found a target in my over inquisitive optical organs and I must state I felt as if I had blinked-in boulders covered not with moss but vicious evil stinging and scratchy nettle type thingys therefore both salt and said moggy were scratched (pardon the pun) off the list of objects de supernatural auspicious power. I decided to chance my luck (again pardon the pun) with a clover of quad-leafed variety but as such are scare I decided to improvise and fashion one from two of the tri-leafed type, as I have said afore my fine friends my extremely handsome head is not merely a hat rack. Well step 1, pluck a sole leaf from one of a sprig of the particular flora, why! twas a right old doddle, step 2. affix plucked appendage to other intended party with efficient adhesive, well a quote of counting chickens springs to mind to taunt moi as this stage of application twas not such a doddle and suffice to say I tell all who unduly inquire that the small crusty brown patch on my now sadly blighted unsightly hand is of the veruca family, I had been informed that with a little industrious wear and tear it will be gone before I know it. Twas a fib. I decided to forego the rabbits foot as a foot without its rabbit affixed does not bode well no matter what spin one puts on it. Before leaving the house armed with my remaining trophies of medieval type miraculous means I decided to knock on an article of wooded type but suffice to say the most it could be said resulted was a knuckle sandwich of kindling chip and painful type but yours intent on a mission of woo did, with my still smarting grip, arrange the remainder of my providential artefacts about my vehicle in, I now realise erroneously assumed secure state, as just as I was about to embark on the intended stunt the said artefacts rearranged themselves causing considerable enough distraction to result in the vehicle performing a career of the catastrophic type you witness above and all objects were projected and studded about my person, these and in particular the horseshoe of luck bringing about nothing but protrusions of type. Said mission of pained and purplish bumpwoo was abandoned until all disfigurements were nothing but a painful memory |