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Hello friends, today you evidence yours, up to this point having a ball but swiftly changed to being had by a bull, truly a moment before the not too favourable tangible entangle with this beastly Taurus.

I had been briefed by my hapless agent Isaac Howboy, yes you know, he of prophetic parents, of a continental gig’ of which I hastily add the fiscal remuneration was not an effective inducement but, a few days gratuitous vacation in pleasant location was, and twas without doubt a beneficial opportunity to broaden my audience by captivating a continental quarter after exposing them to my numerous and exceptional entertaining talents, therefore I had departed with eagerness and arrived with promptness to a pleasant little place called Pamplona in Spain where I would, according to my brief partake in the local festivities, get up close and personal with the local celebrity hero, a rather bullish chap by all accounts, and hopefully attract a newsworthy article that will top the classic chit-chat charts contiuously as a consequence, and he had outfitted me with complimentary and complimenting cheery red headwear to sport to keep the blazing Spanish sun from blinding my optical organs.

My, surely briefest ever, brief had specified a particular rendezvous point at specific time with the still mysterious, perhaps a Super - I chuckled to myself, - hero, so having arrived within the designated vicinity decided to soak up the culture whilst awaiting my local celebrity chap so sporting a confident air due to sporting my favourably fetching, fashionable and as is always my favourite, FREE, headwear I did mingle amongst the local multitudes and I was getting the impression the chap was a celeb, Nay! Star of some magnitude, why they were lining the streets dozens deep and there were rousing cries of, well being verbally challenged in any continental area I haven’t any notion as to names or other notable information whatsoever bandied, so I’ll skip ahead just leaving you with the vision of a thronging mass of rowdy rumbustious ranting contributing to the jubilant convivial local atmosphere.

Well of a sudden the crowd was thunderous in its uproar why the ground was shaking with their adulation so yours truly, being rather diminutive, in stature only as my Star is of great magnitude, was under the assumption the popular personage had arrived so did manoeuvre up and down in rapid succession bandying my renowned title which was guaranteed to arrest his attention, yes I did bellow out, to whom I had still not a clue, over here senor tis  LemMe Out,
L E M M E O U T  Lemme Out, our agents have been making mutual meetings blah blah blah, yes I decided to merely blah blah blah as there was not a chance on earth he was going to hear anyway and for a moment I did roguishly harbour thoughts of hurling insults on this Star who could throng the streets with his presence, why even yours, Top -Star, truly had not managed this covetous throng inducing heartthrob state that was first known to be globally thrust upon the 60’s mop haired British musical combo quartet of northern origin but globally bound types.

Now apparently I was inadvertently thrusting a minor disturbance upon the innocent party behind as they more than rudely did start insisting I move, yours ever the gent, truly turned to apologise but the cowardly cad was not so daring in the face of confrontation as they had started to run, as yes despite my lack of imposing stature, I did  carry an authorative air, well the said cad was departing with increasing rapidity yet as cowards are want to, still hurling abuse directed towards both myself and my, obviously envy inducing, headwear.

Now the tale does take the swiftest twist in the history of twisted tales and yours, wogaitndering what the dickens was happening to my person, truly had been tossed airborne in an instant, well without out much time for too much thought I did manage to hastily ponder if the conniving cad had used a posh wizardry protégé potter type incantation and cast a turbulent hover spell upon yours truly but no it transpired I been catapulted, so I was later informed by every Tom, Dick Harry, Esteban, Fabio, Lela and Alicia, by a raging bounder of a bull, and most fortuitously, by the good grace of God, not only bypassed the horned tools of his goring trade without untoward and most definitely unwanted tangible result, and even more fortuitously had without realisation grasped one of the said tools of terrifying trade, and was now indivertibly raced against my wilting will through the streets attached by one hand of, I had not until this moment realised, Herculean grip to half a ton of cumbersome nay! fearsome beast who was manoeuvring his incredible bulk, and, incredibly still, mine with incredulous control along the cobbles, which can play unruly and uncontrollable leg havoc with any gait, with the most admirable agility and footwork usually only evidenced on renowned and gifted artisans of graceful steps as Nijinsky, Nureyev or sadly the now nutty Jacko. 

Well for what seemed like days, but I was later informed had been nearer 3 minutes, of such swiftness that my own furiously flashing passing life was rendered a mere blur, and amidst many prayers and the shortest sightseeing excursion ever, I managed to stay bonded by my, I recall, absolutely frozen in fear, which had far more effect than the most reliable of vices or exceptional glue of super super status, grip.

Well to cut what could well be a lengthy and most bitter, story short, yes! my prophetic, (like father like son) or conniving agent was indeed correct as yours, bruised, battered and sore thankfully not of gore but just as a result of rough and uncontrollable, ride and of ego, truly did get far too up close and personal with the local celebrity hero who was without out doubt, the promised and more, bullish character and without any doubt I made the news, as the guffaws and gossip did resound at the publicly evidenced event carried during on the agonising journey to the hospital-general did not stop  back at the general vicinity of my supposedly hospitablevacation  establishment, increased incessantly on the way to the airport at the hands of the barely able to conceal his tittering taxi chap and apparently were rife among the international unruly vine of bitter grapes as no matter where I am bound or whom I'm bound to meet, the boars do bring up the bull incident.
 

                                                                                        
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