Well here I was about to deliver a rather superb performance when along ambles this, apparantly pleasant, one would rightly assume based on his visually wholesome garb, chap,  BUT NO I was momentarily duped, I was in the midst of politely acknowledging him when I swear the bounder maliciouly taunted  my goodself (witness his  gloating countenance) with
not only the the visual and tangible  (to those of herculean strength) evidence of his delightfully cute yet freakishly magnified to such  colossal proportion pet but also by cruelly bandying verbal taunts highlighting the said cuteness  informing me that he had created with said pet, a human curiosity magnet to out shadow not only my most talented endeavours but a bearded baby
should one exist. When I witnessed the looming bulk of the pet I swear I broke into a non too pleasant perspiration attack, my only thoughts being should this perpetrator loose his footing your's truly could be pulped or asphyxiated therefore depriving the world of a wonderful variety entertainmert career.