Good day my fine friends today’ s picture, the sight of gargantuan installation of a rubber or plastic type ducky artifice cannot fail to saturate you in a sunny disposition   As you are aware I am an artisan of both the dramatic arts and of cobbling together bits, bats and odd ends to make structures and decorative pieces for public pleasuring, but I am, which was a little known fact until this very moment in the lengthy span of existence an avid collector of all objet de rubber ducky plastic pet pieces, yes my Superstar pad is stuffed to brimming capacity with quirky, comforting chubby chums of ducky effigy.

Therefore despite Feeling a tad intimidated about getting to grips with a continental lexicon, `Bonjour` and `Oui` being pretty much the extent of such, the prospect of a quest of quack type trek to the "Loire Estuary 2007" outdoor, contemporary-art exhibition by Dutch artist florentijn hofman to pay homage to a 85ft statuesque such wholesome icon was enough to give me uncontrollable quiver of glee about my barmy body not to mention the opportunity to make a considerable pecuniary benefit from mini iconic merchandise.

Such adorable little chaps have, however in much less than this this 26 metre and if I dare say a bit of braggart type, but non the less pleasing form, brought pleasure to millions of discerning duck devotees over the years.
 
Yes they have dutifully succumbed to being hoicked out of circulatory and surely rather tedious channels of aquatic travel with a vicious hook and head-hoop combo to provide funfair entertanment and knick-knackery attainment, and quite complacently allowed their little lovely selves to be bundled and dumped with apparant total lack of loving care by the thousand into rivers for further aquatic sport type race purpose and further pleasuring of the masses and earning a fair bit of dosh for charitable cause. Yours truly has been charged on a number of occasions with trespass to property, interfering with goods and disturbing the peace due to pre arranging the little plastic pets so they safely and in a civilised state enter the said rivers without detriment to their little precious persons resulting in a duck conga rather than race, still entertaining I believe, but this apparently plays havoc with the prize winning formula.

Due to my concern over the exploitation without due concern for the welfare of the duck nation not being treated with the respect they deserve I and a band of carefully chosen adoring activists have been party to a number of rubber ducky emancipations and I must say played no small part in the release of 30,000 pet formed plastics into the ocean where they have freely roomed the aquatic expanses of the globe in congregated throng for over 15 years without detracting from the joy of entertaining when news of a sighting did result and played no small part in aiding research of scientific kind I might add. After the release I and my band were carried seaborne by our appreciative escapees for a considerable number of salty and sun scorching oceanic miles feasting on only the surface scavenged for raw fruits de la mer but what was a 1st degree sunburn turned crustaceous due to a biting and salty wash and a diet of fresh wiggly bits if it gives freedom to so many.

Some duckies, perhaps due to maybe being ousted, especially by younger beings in favour of not so wholesome type play thingies, have even adopted the form of celebrity wannabe-duck-combo hybrid type to perhaps procure a renaissance of affection, well LemMe says stop! and be yourself, your little rotund and classic form is a beacon, an icon and a promise of things wholesome, you are far more a pleasurably formed plastic piece than the plastic formed persons you desire to emulate. Sadly as I say the world has succumbed to the unwholesome for its pastime and the rubber ducky is appreciated only by discerning persons well I feel the tide should turn and with it the rubber ducky should bob back into global bath tubs and hearts without further delay.

Well I was interrupted midst my entrepreneurial exercise and homage to the ultimate aquatic and bath time treat by an unnecessary number of gendarmes and was dutifully informed I was under arrest as they had reason to believe due to my infamous reputation of emancipating purpose that I might interfere with this installation, I tried to explain that not even a brace nay! horde of superheroes could interfere with uber ducky but they bundled me off and on the bright side I feel my grasp of the lexicon had much improved as I distinctly heard references to ze revolooshen, geeeoteene and activeeste well I did the old, “look what's that”-and-point-combo-trick, which thankfully the act of a definite digit point crosses most language barriers and whilst they sated their curiosity I hot footed it back to my own harbour of safety where I soaked for an afternoon to cleanse myself of the days grime in a bubbly tub of dozens of my little collective buddies but the en masse bobbing does appear to cause an intermittent aquatic ebb resulting in an erratic tide mark about my tub,

eeh such larks